Thursday, March 07, 2013

Denver 5 Proof of Concept, pt 02

A few months ago, I and a friend kicked around an aborted comics project featuring superhuman jerks being jerks on a truly superhuman level. Character descriptions are here and the pilot plots are posted below.

*Doctor Bob, sitting at a desk with Tyler. This is a profile shot instead of the head-on shot of 001. It established that although the words are the same, this is actually a different strip.*
(DB): "All metas trained by U.N.I.T.Y. may be called upon at any time to serve a front-line role in an emergency."
*Shows Tyler using a defibrillator over a dummy. DB's voice continues, but he is, again, not present.*
DB: "Basic first aid should be administered unhesitatingly and expertly. U.N.I.T.Y. certification means saving lives, and doing so responsibly."
*Shows Tyler moving ambulances over a simple map of a city with fires on various buildings. OR with parts of a miniature city in front of him, a 'scoreboard' is behind him with a countdown timer and words similar to "Crisis Response Scenario 03." Regardless of the exact image, DB is again only narrating and not present. Again.*
DB: "Whether it's because of your meta abilities or perceived affiliation with U.N.I.T.Y., others will often defer to you in a crisis."
*Cuts back to Bob and Tyler in the room.*
DB: "Your goal is to be ready for any—"
Tyler *incredulous*: "Wait. The Spider is here?"

*Tyler his holding up a pair of shorts in U.N.I.T.Y. colors with "U.N.I.T.Y." stamped on them.*
Tyler: "Seriously? Can't I run in my clothes?"
*Wider shot, with CP wearing his shorts and shirt and Spider standing to the side.*
CP: "The breakdown of your independent spirit wouldn't be complete if you weren't forced to wear demeaning, branded clothing."
Spider: "Besides, no one will even see you; the entire compound is walled-in."
Tyler: "Easy for you to say. Why do you get to wear your gimp suit?"
Spider: "It's adaptive matter."
*Spider pointing to its face and CP and Tyler look vaguely disgusted*
Spider: "Besides, with a face like this, do you want to see my calves?"

*The three of them are walking outside. There is indeed a cement wall in the distance. CP and Tyler are in U.N.I.T.Y. PT gear. Spider is in his suit. CP is slightly ahead of Tyler and is smirking slightly*
Tyler: "So we're just going to race each other? That doesn't seem very...developmental."
CP: "I didn't think so either, but Giohi is our instructor and he's pretty good."
Tyler: "Really? I didn't think he could even speak. He looks like a—"
*The word bubble tracks onto the next page and breaks just past the panel border*
*All three are silent as Giohi gives them a stare. Tyler's eyes are wide with surprise/fear.*
*Giohi is gone. Tyler is still affected by its glare. CP and Spider are stretching.*
Tyler: "That was...effective instruction."

*Head on shot. Spider, Tyler, and CP on the starting line of a track.*
Tyler: "They say you're fast Spider, but I have enhanced strength too. Think you can take me?"
Spider: "In terms of hitting criminals, I'm very fast. Generally, I don't need any considerable foot speed for that."
Tyler: "So I'm going to smoke you?"
Spider *shrugging*: "You can't be good at everything."
*Blam sounds comes from behind them.*
*Tyler and CP are still on the starting line. There's a cloud where The Spider was. Tyler looks surprised.*

*Wide shot of the track, just close enough to tell Tyler from CP from The Spider.*
Tyler: "Fuck!"
*A wider shot as the view expands to include spider's increasing distance from the others.*
_____CP________TF____________Spider (at half-lap)
*Widen it out again, as TF approaches the first bend and The Spider has rounded the second.*
Spider (almost finished with his lap)________CP____________TF (almost half lap)
Tyler: "Fuck."

*Locker room again. CP and Tyler look tired. Spider looks wet and has a towel on. Still wearing his suit.*
Tyler: "Well, that was asinine."
Tyler: "What's the point of having a pair of neophytes like us race against someone like you?" *pointing at The Spider.*
Tyler: "Was it some lesson about not running if you ever come after me? Because I learned that."
Spider *obviously imagining something nice*: "Man, if criminals were that smart, it would make my nights so easy!"
*same shot, but The spider suddenly looks sad. Everyone else looks uneasy.*
Spider: "but boring."


Derek said...

I didn't get these, pretty good :)

Derek said...

Also it looks like you picked up a bot :(

VanVelding said...

Yeah, always bots.

And I'm definitely trying to wrangle these strips so that they're mo focused on humor and pushing a story.