Monday, July 18, 2011

GoMnomnom: Time Served

I can't tell you guys how great it is to have a blog, a schedule, and a few days of responsible pad in case something goes horribly wrong. It's all grown up and...predictable.
Having a time table in your life, a rhythm is one of those surprisingly cool mature things. I

It occurs to me that I want to be like House (everyone does), but my lack of any dramatic medical condition means I'll have to settle for an addiction to extra-strength bayer and letting my leg fall asleep sometimes.
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Eighteen years ago, a refugee woman from Sudan worked to get her children to a UN refugee camp and to get her son to a better school. Runs recruited him to go to a Roman Catholic boarding school and from there he went to high school in the United States. He's currently graduating from The University of Columbia and plans on becoming a doctor so he can go back home to South Sudan.

I know, after almost a month of posting heartwarming songs every weekend, that maybe you guys are tired of heartwarming stuff (or 1/7 tired of it. I just don't know these things), but it's pretty awesome that even though several million people died in the events that spurred his mother to leave their home and even in the relative peace it's hard for people to find jobs, but it's still a story about how these people with nothing aren't starving to death, weren't turned back and butchered, manage to still survive, and even occasionally see their dreams for their kids come true. Yeah, it would be better if all of these people had their own homes and jobs and didn't live in constant insecurity with a nation wracked by a history of inhuman violence, but given that such is the case and will be the case until we really decide to do something to change it, I can be pretty happy that the UN, the US, and even some organized religious folks from the Vatican can help give some people an opportunity.
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Ryan Reynolds will apparently be in another comic book movie. Man, just...I don't know...Ryan Reynolds, do a romantic comedy or something. Even better:
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What I don't get about Braid is that if--like Forza--I'm some sort of all powerful Time Lord (TM), then why can't I do any of the speed trials right? Seems like if I control time, I should just be able to drop my time-slowing ring onto the timer and moonwalk walk my way through that shit while the music plays backwards.
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Speedo is going to have a kinect swimming product placement game featuring Michael Phelps. I'm going to skip all of the obvious, sexy questions and just ask if there's DLC for replacing Michael Phelps' face with someone else's. Anyone else's[1].
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A list of unconscionable scientific acts the writer (and most of us) wants to see. I'm partial to "Fire things into the Sun" myself. Your mileage may vary.
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Have any of you guys ever heard of Star Crusader and/or Millennia: Altered Destinies? Crusader is a space fighting sim that incorporates stealth. I quit it because it was pretty obvious that my guys were the bad guys and my heroic turn wasn't coming quite quickly enough. While I can't remember exactly which mission was the breaking point, I didn't want my tally of simulated intergalactic innocents killed to hit the double (or was it triple) digits before I decided do something else with my time. Millennia was also a spacefighting sim, but it was also like Civilization, if Civilization consisted of you being commissioned by dudes from beyond time to stop some intergalactic spores from taking over another galaxy by making the four civilizations that inhabit it into a bad ass union of spore-busting jerks. I think I quit because the first thirty seconds of play consisted of my getting my butt kicked by the version of me who had done this before and failed trying to kill me because he thought that I was the version of him who was going to try to fix it later and fuck it all up (which makes no sense now that I think about it, unless I'm an immortal, suicidal jerk). Anyway, because either I hadn't read the novel-sized control scheme or because I simply lacked the motor skills to beat myself[2], I quit and just played Spaceward Ho! for hours on end instead (Yes, that is a picture of a guy riding a shark-ship with a planet wearing a cowboy hat overhead.)
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Also, people keep trying and failing to kill Casey Anthony, usually by killing someone who looks like Casey Anthony. Look, guys; I'm not saying you're right or wrong, but I am saying that if you cared so much about this case, maybe you'd do some basic research about how the woman wasn't even released from jail until Sunday and lives several thousand miles away from you and get a friggin' photograph or something. If you feel so passionately about dead babies, maybe you should realize that for every baby neglected to death and punted into the woods in the US, there are thousands of babies dying, starving, and growing up without proper medical care in the world[3] and pull your heads out of your asses![4]
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I don't know if this is one of those things I'm contractually obligated to do (like pretending the Freddie Mercury's mustache isn't dick repellant), the result of introducing strangers to The Producers, or just a disturbing segue, but man, I've got this incredible urge to make a Broadway musical based on Children of Men.

[1]Was going to link the AIDS PSA where they shop Hitler's face over a guy to tell people AIDS is bad, Hitler-bad, but it's actually a bit more explicit than I remembered and it's not on YouTube.
[2]Insert obvious joke about how those skills have improved markedly with time. 
[3] Including the US, you assholes.
[4] Apparently some of those reports have since been debunked, but I'm leaving the rant because it segues into Children of Men.

1 comment:

VanVelding said...

RE: Ryan Reynolds
You're off the hook because of "The Change-Up," but I'm still watching you.