Monday, July 11, 2011

GoMnomnom: My Office

I just realized that 6/16 was the sixth-month anniversary of me trying to do this thing on a regular basis. I’d hoped that being this far in, I’d have developed a better and more consistent style. Instead I have 43 MB of MCChris pasted over Magic cards and…

Ah well, life continues, as it does.

As some of you know, I work on a barge in The Gulf of Mexico. My barge removes and (it is rumored, in whispered tones) installs the oil platforms that get gas and oil out of the Gulf, or as Grant Morrison might put it, "extract explosive Non-Solids from the sub aquatic graves of The Great Lizards beneath the oceans themselves!"

It’s dangerous work, but as a clerk, I work in an office (pictured above), managing payroll, handling shipping and manifests, and doing other computer things that have to be done, considering the average age and cultural background of the people I work with. Seriously, it’s sometimes like working with Pakleds.

Guy: “Help me. My computer will not go.”
Me: “What’s wrong with it?”
Guy: “Whenever I use the Ebay, it will not go. Give me things to make it go.”

I don’t know a lot about computers. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve got some programming background, but troubleshooting an internet connection is a pretty far way from If-Then statements.

We also have Filipino guys on the barge, who aren’t stupid, but who are drawn from the same class/educational background as the American guys and have a language barrier to contend with. Since they’re usually over here for four to six months straight, whenever they need pay, supply, and equipment issues taken care of, I get to take care of it. Trying to help a guy get paid correctly when he can’t answer the questions you have about his pay and he keeps interrupting you when you ask them…it’s not the best part of the job.

I’m not complaining though (Well, I am, but the complaints aren't my point.). The pay is good, the job is straightforward, and I get to get away from all of the bullshit on shore for twenty-eight days at a time. I won’t whine about my personal life (right now. Don’t worry, it’ll come later), but for right now, it’s nice that I only spend a third of my life dealing with it.

Next time I do an article like this, I promise you either pictures of lifting really big things or of some beautiful sunrises or some shit.

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