Time: Oct 1, 2006
Location: A forum on the internet
[Name Withheld 01]: And I hate to say it, but where is ANY kind of body armor for ground forces....oh wait, they dont HAVE ground forces, they just send the "security" guys down there. Even during the Dominion War, no one even THOUGHT about putting any personell assigned to ground duty in any body armor.
[Name Withheld 02]: That's right -- Noone. Including the Cardassian and Dominion militaries.
VanVelding: There's a reason for that:
Scene: Start of the Dominion War, somewhere near the Cardassian/Federation/Bajoran/whatever border. Sisko, Weyoun, and Dukat sit down.
Weyoun: Captain, we should discuss the terms on which this war is to be fought.
Sisko: That's why I'm here gentlemen.
Dukat: You'll see our suggestions on this padd.
Sisko: *Looks over the padd* This says that in exchange for your never hitting Earth or using subspace mines, we agree to never mine or collapse the wormhole.
Dukat: We'd like this war to be relatively free of empty drama and plot devices.
Sisko: I'm afraid I can't agree to that gentlemen, The Federation wins wars on empty drama and plot devices.
Weyoun: Captain, without these provisions, this war could drag on for years.
Dukat: And I'd like to be able to attend just one of my son's birthdays.
Sisko: I'll give you a counter-proposal; no one uses shields, body armor, or even really good dodging.
Weyoun: That will certainly speed things along...and no cloaking devices?
Sisko: It's safe to say you won't be seeing that during this war.
Dukat: Very good captain.
*All leave*
A few hours later, on the way back to Cardassia:
Dukat and Weyoun in unison:....dammit!
No comments:
Post a Comment