Honk for Jesus. Save Your Soul. (September 2nd)
I like that we don't even know what scandal it is they're recovering from, but from Sterling K. Brown's character, it could be anything. It looks like he does a high energy, barely-on-the-leash character who nonetheless knows how to use that.
He's carrying all the protagonist weight, so Regina Hall gets to do character stuff in his world. I know almost nothing about the story but I'm intrigued. Watch it while doing dishes and get pulled in out of ten.
Clerks III (September 4th)
There's not a lot to say about Clerks III that Clerks III isn't already saying for me. Maybe it can watch itself, too. See it at a friends house out of ten.
Barbarian (September 9th)
Don't know. Don't care. Enjoy your secret torture basement with modern flourish [subtype: AirBnB] thriller.
Circling back around to Clerks, do we need movies from people we like with characters who entertain us to be good? Aren't things like "story structure" and "message" just classist constructs to separate creators I like who make sounds and images that stimulate me from popular appeal? Of course not. Stories are satisfying because they're stories. If you want base stimulation, create a new genre of shiny pictures to sit alongside porn and Pocoyo.
The Silent Twins (September 16)
Fascinating and the story's lean on imagination with the imagery in the trailer tells me nothing of the movie. Which is good.
Watch it on a date and miss the beautiful, tragic ending because I was making out of ten.
Bros (September 30th)
Speaking of gay stuff, Bros. I guess part of having representation in the media is having the identity-based dysfunction of the LGBT community brought to light. I've rolled it around and how dare Hollywood say something so true?
Billy Eichner is funny but also...not funny. I hope he's found a good vehicle, but I also hope it's not the one where I identify with a main character who gets a guy two leagues above his own because he's a well-known actor.
I liked the porn better out of ten.
Don't Worry, Darling (September 23rd)
If the Stepford Wives met The Prisoner remake. I feel like there's another movie that had a psychological suburbia feel that came out not too long ago. Vivarium (thanks, Reddit).
This one looks much better because it evokes the aesthetic of the 60's while also invoking the dirtier, realism which underpinned that era.
Also, I worry about Chris Pine. I don't know why but I do. The resignation of accepting Harry Styles in films out of ten.
The Woman King (September 16)
Looks badass, but I'm not into action movies. Are people who are into the atavistic power fantasies of action movies really looking for an anti-colonialist movie featuring a black woman lead? May-be. I wouldn't bet on it, but I'm glad someone did.
Best of luck you mad bastards out of ten.
Gigi and Nate (September 2nd)
In what world does the CGI monkey get top billing? I'm kiddin'; a recovering quadriplegic gets a service monkey and then faces...monkey-based discrimination and has the monkey taken away and has to make a big Pike Speech to get it back.
Good but also weaksauce out of ten.
Smile (September 30th)
Why are there so many horror movies coming out in September? This one comes out on September 30th, so that's basically October, but on the other hand, why?
It's a basic Ring-slash-It-Follows-slash-Fallen affair where there are rules and a character is going to die after a week of jumpscares.
Watch on silent in the background out of ten.
Land of Dreams (September 16th)
Why do I do this? Why do I collect movies each month? Mostly because I assume folks want to know what's coming out in the fucking hurrinado of media surrounding media releases that press a few well-marketed titles onto consumers who find it too hard to find out what their options really are.
But also so I can find out about movies like Land of Dreams. I love it and if I'm going to watch any movie on this list, it'll be that one.
Out of ten.
Series Coming Out:
4th - Rick and Morty: That was quick, wasn't it?
5th - American Dad, Season 17: Christ, that's a lot of seasons.
15th - Atlanta, Season 4: Dang, I need to watch this.
19th - Quantum Leap: Yup. It's a sequel series.
30th - Reboot: Not a reboot of Reboot. It's an original series about reboots. I'd link the trailer, but there isn't one. How do you have a series releasing in 30 days and you don't have a trailer?
21st - The Connors: That's still running? I guess losing Roseanne wasn't a dealbreaker.
25th - The 25th must be a Friday because Simpsons (34th season), Bob's Burgers (13th), Family Guy (21st) are all out. I only mention them because damn, those are some numbers!
25th - The Rookie, Season 5: We all love Nathan Fillion, but how is he still a rookie at this point?
29th - Young Sheldon, Season 6: At this point, isn't he just..."Sheldon"?
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