Wednesday, September 26, 2012

It's the Magic: Golgari/Izzet

I did and blink-and-you'll-miss-it review of Izzet vs. Golgari last week. That's my full review. It's pretty straightforward. The only other notable thing about Izzet vs. Golgari is how incredibly homoerotic it is. You doubt me? Check below the cut (NSFW. I mean, there aren't any dicks, but if someone sees you looking at this, they'll think it's your thing and nothing you can say will change their opinion.)

Putrefy guy gives the most amazing backrubs.

Name of the card is "Thunderheads." You can figure the rest out.

Apparently, the gay kama sutra was written by an ogre from Ravnica. He assures us this was research.

Elf shamen ejaculate lava and tiny goblins. Biology is truly strange and beautiful.

It's not blurred because fellatio crosses some line that lava bukkake doesn't, but Niv-Mizzet's junk is too glorious to behold.

"Sphinx-Bone Wand"? This is too easy.

Isochron Sphinx-Bone Wand Scepter

Dreg Manglers will run their tongues all over Sphinx-Bone Wands.

Izzet Guildmage is just...it would be harder for me to think of a context where he's not trying to give head or eat a giant hot dog.

Still glorious.

Otherworld Atlas isn't in Izzet vs Golgari, but I needed a "put a book in front of it" joke.

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1 comment:

Derek said...

LMAO

waiting for the full diorama replication of the orgy scene in Caligula using magic cards.