Putrefy guy gives the most amazing backrubs.
Name of the card is "Thunderheads." You can figure the rest out.
Apparently, the gay kama sutra was written by an ogre from Ravnica. He assures us this was research.
Elf shamen ejaculate lava and tiny goblins. Biology is truly strange and beautiful.
It's not blurred because fellatio crosses some line that lava bukkake doesn't, but Niv-Mizzet's junk is too glorious to behold.
"Sphinx-Bone Wand"? This is too easy.
Isochron Sphinx-Bone Wand Scepter
Dreg Manglers will run their tongues all over Sphinx-Bone Wands.
Izzet Guildmage is just...it would be harder for me to think of a context where he's not trying to give head or eat a giant hot dog.
Otherworld Atlas isn't in Izzet vs Golgari, but I needed a "put a book in front of it" joke.