Rule of Life #18

Rule of Life #19: Look Where You're Going

That's a tricky one. We aren't just creatures of the moment, but creatures of the future.

Our world awards people who stay the course. It loves stability. The child who's dreamt of being a teacher, who attends college for being a teacher, and spends decades as a teacher is a prized teacher indeed.

The dilettante who flits from profession to profession? They're less valued. The world wants to know who you are, what you want, and why you're here. It can't tolerate waiting for a few moments while you explain.

So the future, having a goal and working tirelessly towards it. That's what works. Keeping your eye on the horizon and making slow step after slow step towards it.

Also, y'know, it helps detect tripwires when you're in a dungeon.

17 to 01: The Cage

My friend Derek and I talk about the original Star Trek pilot, "The Cage," as we watch it on Netflix.

The Last Tuesday Before January 30th is a time to party

Rule of Life #18

Rule of Life #18: Everyone is good at surviving until they aren't.

So I was in line behind this woman at Wal-Mart. She was pushing her mid-forties and maybe 250 lbs simultaneously. Her cart was full of the most useless upper-middle class crap a person could buy before they had to go to Whole Foods.

She was on her phone as we waited in line, "...but you know, I'm good at surviving," she said to her friend. I gave her a look of incredulity I save for people who "don't want that social justice crap in Star Trek." 

But then I thought for a moment and, yeah, it was undeniable. As she lived and breathed, she was good at surviving. Grizzly Adams bullshit notwithstanding, she was surviving. 

Of course, "surviving" implies overcoming obstacles, continuing on in despite of obstacles. I get that.

But this woman was surviving exactly as well as my 5' 8", seen-some-things-and-some-stuff-wouldn't-recommend-it ass has. Pretenses aside, I was doing no better than her. Probably worse, actually.

The corollary, naturally, is that the fall-off point is pretty sharp. When you quit surviving, it is a pronounced change of status.

Tiny Detectives

Tumblr Thursday: Slow News Day

You know I love my Tumblr. Every Thursday I take some time to repost quality images I've happened across in Tumblr. Mostly funny, sometimes serious, and sometimes sexy.

Linkstorm: Lightning Round!

So a boy known as "Kunkun" has been ostracized by his rural, Chinese community. China is a big, diverse country and it's really mind-boggling to try to take all of it in. Anyway, the Chinese government did that thing that communist governments should do and stepped in to take care of the kid.

Hopefully, it'll end up like the story of Quian Hongyan, also known as "The Basketball Girl." After losing her legs in a car accident, her impoverished family couldn't afford to buy her prosthetics. Instead, they used basketballs to act as a contact patch for her lower torso. In 2005, her story was covered by the press and she was contacted by a Beijing clinic dedicated to helping disabled, low-income individuals.

It's nine years later, she's a minor celebrity and intends to represent China as a paralympic swimmer. She hopes the publicity she's gotten will help change attitudes in China towards the disabled.

Gilbert Gottfried Reads Fifty Shades of Grey

Charlie Hebdo

The really big headline is the attack on the satirical French publication, Charlie Hebdo. Two gunmen, brothers Saïd and Chérif Kouachi, stormed the offices, killing ten staff and two police officers on January 7th. Over the next two days, their cell was uprooted and five more French citizens were killed before the Kouachi brothers and another terrorist, Amedy Coulibaly, were trapped in two separate locations in northern France.

Rule of Life #17

Rule #17: Skill unused does not exist.

As a guy who doesn't write more things than he writes, this one is pretty close to home. I've met a lot of folks who believe that they're pretty great at things they never fucking do.

The hard fact is that your potential, talent, and training mean nothing if you don't use it. It's nice that you've got those things, but where's the beef?

Tumblr Tuesday: Guarantee

You know I love my Tumblr. Every Thursday I take some time to repost quality images I've happened across in Tumblr. Mostly funny, sometimes serious, and sometimes sexy.

Credit: Originally from reddit poster popups4life, posted to Tumblr by Tastefully Offensive, and brought to my attention by omegablue231.

Hobbit 3 / Lord of the Rings -1: Battle of 4 2/2 Armies

Known in America as "These Motherfuckers Again: Plus Other Motherfuckers Again"

When we last left The Hobbit, Smaug was getting himself emotionally pumped for a busy night of burninating both the countryside, the villagers, and the thatched roof cottages of Lake Town. Because I've started playing Skyrim since this all started, my usual line-by-line commentary has been alloyed by my perspective as the Dovahkiin.

*Smaug burns down the village as the villagers scream.* "But it's a literally a Lake Town. Just...jump into the water villagers." "Fish shit in there!" screams one villager. "'e shits in there!" screams another, gesturing at the first. 

They burn to death and I cast heal with both hands as I walk through the fire, but not before looting their bodies to gain two bone meal.

I can see Tauriel looking up at Smaug as he strafes the village with fire again. His ability to both move and use a breath weapon makes him terrifying, especially for an archer. None the less, I can already see the finishing move where she surfs him into the bottom of the lake.

I can only assume it's called "Lake Town Lake," because that's how things are named here apparently.

Age of Ultron and...

Houma Movie Club: Phase 11

Sadly, we didn't get to record the Houma Movie Club Flip This Movie End of Year Event, but we are rolling into 2015 with a new set of movies and a slight jump in the numbering scheme.

So yeah, Big Fish, but with Jared Leto. If that doesn't interest you, maybe you missed the part with Jared Leto. But seriously, I'm gambling on this movie having a bit more high concept sci-fi meat on its bones than being Sliding Doors or Butterfly Effect with a prettier protagonist.

The Maniac trailer says so much and so little that I can't help but be intrigued by it. It says it's a horror movie, but it looks more like a thriller. Can any of you tell me what the difference is?

I know what you're thinking: it's an Asylum movie. But there is no kind of movie to sit down and watch with your friends like an Asylum movie.

You know who watches movies and loves a high concept?

This guy.

I'm going to call this the least obnoxious person-falls-in-love-with-a-robot film ever made.

Okay, second least.

Delightful Buzz Red - A Credible Story

Vlog Series - Batman